I, admittedly, am very “gotten” by brewery swag. Over the years, I’ve accumulated a hulking collection of beer shirts; I own not one, but two pairs of beer socks, neither of which fit me; and on cold, lonely nights, I often find myself admiring the beautiful beer-branded hoodies digitally hanging in brewery e-comm sites.
Basically, I love all of these things, not only because wearing them allows me to share my pride and support for my favorite breweries, but because I’m pretty much clueless about fashion and “beer” is the closest thing I have to caring about a brand. The trouble is, there’s something even more addictive and exhilarating to collect when it comes to beer merch—coasters.
I collect everything from bottle caps to tap handles for various unforeseen projects, and among of all of my obsessions, beermats might be the biggest. I pick them up everywhere, and though I haven’t counted how many I own (probably because I’d be embarrassed of the answer), I can safely say there’s an overstuffed shoebox full of them, and by shoe I mean boot, and by boot I mean they’re also all over my desk, bedroom, boyfriend’s car and kitchen, and that’s after I made everyone Christmas coaster ornaments last year, or several collages for my room, like this one:
That being said, it should come as no surprise that I have a soft spot for Swag Brewery, a company that makes beer-inspired gifts like scented candles, soap and hop candy for beer nerds with spending problems. (I am totally not one of them.) Anyway, today I was checking up on their site to order my next round of scented beer candles (they don’t even have beer in them) and I came across an interesting factoid on the company blog:
Tegestology, a name for my sickness. There’s even a title for its afflicted, “tegestologists.” I checked it out with some expert research (around the Internet), and although there isn’t much literature on the subject, aside from its free dictionary definition (tegestology: the collecting of cardboard beer coasters. — tegestologist, n.) and Wikipedia article (tracing it back to the Latin, though Swag says it’s Greek), I cannot recall a time I’ve felt more redeemed.
Here’s an inexplicable video touting testology from 1960s English comedians, Morecambe And Wise:
I’ll let you enjoy these British brethren on your own.
Your trusty tegestologist,
BeerAffair